Trusting the lamp unto my feet

"Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path."  Psalm 119:105

This verse has popped up in my head countless times these last few months.  Several years ago, a wise pastor (it could have been Craig Groeschel, Mike Meeks, or Ben Sigman; I just don't remember, but they're all wise, so it doesn't matter much) talked about this lamp unto our feet.  A lamp does not show you the entire way to your destination.  It just illuminated the next few steps.  The point is to trust that when you are following God's will, you don't need to see how it's all going to end.  When you feel like He's leading you to do something, reflexively say "YES" and don't worry about the hows and the whys.  This past year has been a great opportunity for me to trust this lamp unto my feet.  Look at where I am right now.  I'm in UKRAINE, with the rest of my family back home.  I'm staying alone in an apartment for several weeks with two little boys who don't speak my language.  If I'd seen this snapshot in the beginning, I don't know if I'd had the guts or the faith to do this.

Yet, here I am, and today has been another great day.  The boys and I had a lazy morning.  I pulled out a 750 piece puzzle.  My family knows that once I open that box, I cannot rest until the last piece is put into place.  So, I hovered over the puzzle for several hours.  Both boys would help out periodically, then go play Angry Birds, or watch tv, or have a snack, then come help me with the puzzle some more.  They are starting to loosen up and act like real boys.  Lots of smiles, laughs, and horsing around today.  It was good to see them roughhousing like brothers do, but it made me a bit nervous, too, wondering what I would do if one of them got hurt.  At one point I was wrestling with Isaac (who weighs NOTHING) and his nose ended up against the wall.  Hard.  He immediately got up and ran for the bathroom. I followed him in a panic to find him rinsing out his mouth.  Nothing bleeding, apparently nothing broken, but that's one tough kid.  Most kids I know would have cried or whined and wanted Mommy's comfort.  Isaac has never known that option.  The only option he knows is to tough it out on his own.  Both boys are learning, though.  They're saying "Mommy" as often as they possibly can.  It may be to point out that the washing machine is done, or to ask for a glass of water, or just because they want a hug.  I think they really like being able to say it and have someone respond.

Anya came over around 3:00 for another English lesson.  She is amazed at how hard these boys are working.  She says they are both very motivated to learn.  Yeah, I think they'll fit into our family well.  :)  After only a few days, I can see that the boys are picking up some English from me.  I've been talking to them in English only, keeping the language simple and using visual cues when I can.  As they are hearing the same questions and commands frequently, they are starting to understand and respond appropriately.  Things like, "Would you like milk or juice?"  "Did you wash your hands?" "Food stays in the kitchen!"  I think it's going to snowball.

Football game was tonight.  It was SO COOL.  The boys really seemed to enjoy it and so did I.  What a stadium.  I hope we can go again when Curt is here--I know he'd love it, too.

It's crazy how once you've claimed a child as your own in your heart, that's your child.  These are my children.  I look at them with the same awe and wonder as I do Cassie and Clay.  You know how you stay up late, staring at your babies while they sleep?  That was me last night.  Sometimes it shocks me when I hear them speaking Russian, because I've forgotten that they haven't always been mine.  

By the way, I love that when they say something they don't want me to hear, they whisper.  They could yell it, but as long as it's in Russian, I'm not going to understand it.

So, we're going to church tomorrow with Anya and Den, and then to the Donetsk City Mall, where Curt and I killed time when we first arrived in Donetsk.  The top floor is a kiddie wonderland: ice skating rink, carnival rides, bowling alley, movie theater, arcade, on and on!  It's all very modern and beautiful.  I'm sure we'll have fun.